Beth's Blog

Independent or Selfish?

Independent or Selfish?

I've noticed a societal trend towards embracing the notion of going and doing the things you want to do, by yourself - and this is called independence!

Frequently, this notion is perpetrated amongst the late teens / early 20's via the YOLO slogan: You Only Live Once


Usually, the person is simply being self-absorbed and selfish. There is a difference between being selfish and being Independant!


I’ll explain via an example …. A trip to the movies:

  • I want to go - nobody wants to come with me, I'm going anyway.
  • I've found the location and time, by myself.
  • I am going to get myself there and back, by myself.
  • I have the money to get there, enjoy and return home.


This is the point where most people stop and say – "Yes, I’m independent! I’m doing it my way, all by myself. Yay Me!"


However, that is the narrow view that causes this word “Independence” to be thrown around incorrectly.


There are 3 more questions to ask yourself:

  • Once I spend the money, do I have enough left to pay my bills due now or soon?
  • Confirm: There is nothing else I 'should' be doing, or have committed to doing with this time.
  • Confirm: There is absolutely NO potential for this to insult or hurt or harm anyone else.


If you respond 'yes' to all of these. Yes, you are independent in what you are about to do. Awesome!


If you answer - 'NO' to just one of these ...stop kidding yourself. You ARE dependant .... either Right Now or Very Soon.


Reflect on that and figure out what you need to work on to be Independant.

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Wedge the Axe